Making All Your Dreams Come True Can Be Done

Dreams are often overlooked as something that we will get to.  A project for when we have time.  Something to sustain us while going through a rough time.  When life isn’t so crazy… or chaotic.

However, I had a bit of a revelation this morning as I sat down to write (and I  apologize in advance because this is a lengthy one, but if you stick with me until the end I am positive you’ll understand why and that you’ll agree it was worth your time!).  It’s been a couple of weeks, and I was going to start this out with some blasé comment about how crazy and chaotic life has been – but let’s be honest.  First – I’ve said that before.  Who hasn’t?  Second – when isn’t life crazy and chaotic?

Not that I would want it any other way.  After all, if you sit down and start analyzing why your life is crazy and chaotic, is there anything you would want to change?

When my daughter was born, life became chaotic.  Dance class, gymnastics, T-ball, swimming, play dates, birthdays – and that was all before school started.  No, not at the same time.  I believed it was my responsibility as a parent to expose my daughter to as many different things as I could when she was young, so when she became older she could make the choice herself as to what she wanted to do, and she would have the knowledge to make that decision.

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School life was a whole other chaos.  Especially middle and high school.  Regardless of the age though, there were school events, play dates, birthday parties, sporting events – oh!  Let’s not forget the ever-important aspect of having to go to work to be able to pay for all these activities and events your child/ren want to be involved in.

Photo of an older man on the left, and the author on the right.

About the time my daughter was three, my dad began to have health issues, after many years of dealing with things we didn’t know were issues.  He had his second major heart attack, a few years later he was diagnosed with COPD (which was relatively unknown at that time), and his health began going downhill from there.  Dad was a stubborn old coot, and many times I was required to assist mom in getting him to the hospital or what have you.  That became a whole other chaos and eventually led to taking over the caregiver role as it was too much for mom.

Fast forward a few years, daughter is now out of college and successful in establishing her own life three hours away.  I’m diagnosed with breast cancer and life’s chaos starts anew.  While this wasn’t the most fun chaos and craziness I’ve ever experienced, I am pleased with the direction life has gone afterwards.

But again, there is chaos and craziness.  As I begin to pursue dreams I’ve had all my life, never having the courage (for a previous post regarding how I found courage – click here!) or backbone to pursue, I find that most days are a non-stop whirlwind of activities I should complete.  And, if you didn’t know, I really hate the word “should”.  Somebody once said to me, “Why do you want to “should” all yourself” and ever since then I try very hard to reword that when it comes up.  After all, all ‘shoulding’ on yourself does is make you depressed and feeling like a failure because you haven’t reached your goals or completed your to-do list.

Despite it all, it is a good chaos and craziness.  I’m busy, I’m happy, I’m healthy (as healthy as I can be anyway – oh all right – as healthy as I can be while still enjoying ice cream, chocolate and coffee.  Geez you people are rough! And I love it!)  I still have a way to go in reaching the pinnacle of my dreams, but at this point that’s irrelevant.  What is relevant is every morning I wake up and I do something to make those dreams come true.  And isn’t that what life Is really all about?

We only have one chance at this life.  Well perhaps two for those who experience a near death event.  So, at what point are you going to begin to enjoy the life you’ve been given and do whatever you can to make it the best life ever?

Now don’t go all negative Nellie on me and say “Well I can’t do that, I can barely make enough money to pay the bills” or insert any other statement to prevent you from pursuing your dream.  Whatever that statement is, it simply is not true.  Trust me on that, I’ve been saying them all for years.

Every one of us can create a dream, to pursue that dream, and to achieve that dream.  Will there be obstacles in the way?  Absolutely.  Are there road blocks, and barriers, and detours as well?  Without a doubt.  Will there be days where you think you just don’t have the ambition, the energy, the courage, the stamina to push through another day?  Of course.  Why wouldn’t there be?

I mean honestly.  Wouldn’t there be days like that whether you were pursuing dreams or just attempting to live through the day?

So how do you overcome those road blocks?  How do you wake up each morning and find the drive to make the most of every day, and when you lay your head down on your pillow at night you fall asleep knowing a peace and contentment because you can truthfully say without a doubt that you were the best you, you could be?  And to be able to say that every night, regardless of what happened during the day?

I have developed three simple, well they will become simple with practice, ways I wake up every morning and live intentionally to achieve my dreams.  And you, my lucky reader, are going to be in the know as I am going to share them right here!  However, as with anything I ever share, or say, or suggest, these may not work the same for you as they did with me.

Download your FREE Kreatively Finding Your Dreams guide here!

Another aspect of life is learning what we can, and then we have three choices from there:  1.  We learn and do – just as it is.  2.  We learn and modify – make it yours.  Make it so it will work and be successful for you.  And 3.  We learn and move on – because that just won’t work.  Even then, if #3 is what happens, then keep digging until you find a #1 or #2 choice – because I’ll guarantee something out there will work for you.

It isn’t an easy process though. It’s hard work.  You will need to keep revising, learning, and revising some more.  Always keep this in mind though – anything worth having is worth pursuing.  Regardless of how much work it is.

So.  Without further ado here are my three simple ways to start pursuing the dreams of your lifetime!

Live Authentically

Yeah, I know. You’ve heard this or read this a bazillion times.  But here is where I differ.  It has taken me a very long time to understand what exactly that meant … for me.  There are so many resources out there on how to live authentically, but I have never found, and maybe it is out there, and I just haven’t found it, something that told me I needed to define what that meant to me.

And that, my dear friends, is the little twist.  For if we don’t define what living authentically means to us as an individual, are we living authentically?  When we wake up every morning and choose to not pursue our dream/s because we are not good enough, or talented enough, or not in a good place financially; are we living authentically?

I think not.

So, for my first suggestion I strongly encourage you to spend some time defining your life’s authenticity.  Ask yourself some questions:

What does living authentically mean to me?  Dig deep.  Go beyond the be honest, caring, kind, respectful, generous – because those, to me, are a code of ethics.  Living authentically can include standing by your code of ethics, but those in and of themselves are not living authentically.  They are just one piece of the puzzle.

What dreams do you have?  Have you had a passion for something that you’ve been pushing aside?  Did you ever look at someone and sigh saying, “I wish I could do that?”  What was it?  Write it down.  Create an authenticity list.  Include your code of ethics, your values, your beliefs – because those are what makes up being authentic.  Just don’t stop there.  Go deeper.  And take your time creating this list.  Spend a few days, maybe a week, maybe longer creating this list.  Revise it.  Change    it.  Change it back.  Modify it.  Make it your own.

Here’s a different twist.  Write down what you don’t want to be.  What defines not living authentically.  Is it when someone says one thing and does something different?  How about working in a job you hate?

The purpose of this step is to develop your authentic life.  Because without knowing what that means, without writing it down, do you really know?  And how can you live it if you don’t know what means?

Just like the adage says:  if a tree falls in the forest, can anyone hear it?  If you don’t know what living authentically means, can you live it?

Searching for Your Dream

I don’t know about you, but when I decide I want to do something, I have a pretty bad habit of jumping in with both feet, my two arms, and all the other extremities.  For some reason, I have found that if I am going to do something I am all in. Which isn’t always a bad thing.

However, I have found that usually this will triple or quadruple my work.  I find myself having to completely redo a web site because it is not compatible with a program It need to have.   Or I sign up for a web hosting plan that doesn’t do what I want it to. This list could go on and on.   The bottom line is I usually start something from the end… and that doesn’t work so well.  Nor is it efficient.

So, if you haven’t guessed yet, the second step is to define your dream.  What is it that you dream of doing?  Do you want to become a photographer?  Or maybe it is to become a CNA?  What about staying home and becoming a full-time blogger?  What is it that right before you close your eyes at night flashes through your mind?

Then spend some time defining what you want your end goal to be.  Do you want to work from home?  Or perhaps open a bakery?  A coffee house?  About this time, I begin to write things down because I have a mind swimming with so many ideas, end goals, dreams that they all start colliding into one another.  Which creates a slight attention deficit disorder in that not one idea ever seems to have a beginning, middle or end.

Once you have your list written down, your end goal defined, do your due diligence.  What I mean is start researching people who have accomplished what you want to do.  Is there a favorite blogger you like to read?  Find out their back story.  How did they reach their goals?  Do they have any suggestions on where to start?  What programs you should use?

Or if you need to go back to school, research schools.  Delve deep into their programs, the costs, their expectations of you as a student.   There are plenty of people out there who are willing to share their story.  Some do it for free.  Others charge to take their course.  Which is not a bad idea; however, make sure you spend time researching one that resonates with you.  Find that one that makes you go “ooohhh”.  Because I will guarantee once you start reading up about them, more and more will come across your news feed.

A note of caution here.  Never, ever, purchase or buy something that you cannot afford.  I am all about investing in yourself to achieve your dreams.  I am not about putting yourself into hawk to achieve that.  The first rule of thumb in a budget is making sure you have money for a roof over your head, transportation, and food on the table.  Do not cross that boundary because you found a fabulous course that will make you rich in 90 days by joining up with them – all for only $2,999!  While that might be a good deal, if you can’t afford that without taking money away from something else, then stop!  It is NOT a good deal.

After you have defined authenticity and searched for your dreams comes the fun part.  Implementation of steps to achieve those dreams!

Download your FREE Kreatively Finding Your Dreams guide here!

Post to be continued…..

Until next time, capture life kreatively!

Myra

P.S.  I alluded to the fact of an E-book series – yes that is true!  I am in the process of creating a series of E-books regarding Living Life Kreatively.  They are still in the planning stages and will probably take a while to finish them but if you want to be notified of their progress and when they are complete, sign up for my newsletter.  That way you’ll be one of the first to know!

Finding Courage When I Least Expected It

This past week I found myself doing something I had never done before…. reviewing my photos to present in a vendors portfolio.  It should have been an easy task …. well perhaps easy is not the best word choice; but I definitely was not prepared for the amount of courage it took to hit ‘send’ on that email.

Okay – let me clarify.  It was not the physical act of hitting send that was difficult.  It was finding the courage to stop listening to the years of negative self-talk playing on repeat in my head.  It was like listening to an old 45 record with the needle skipping (and if you don’t know what that is … may I suggest Google?)

Photo of a blue vinyl record player

After I shared the photos with some people, while their comments were not negative, I did start receiving conflicting comments.  Which, of course, just added to my own self-negative talk.  For example, at this very moment, as I write this post, I received a comment that one of my recent favorite photos of my pup Harley standing in a field at sunset, was too dark.

I am not going to say that I did not just not take that personally; because I did.  The story I was trying to portray in that image was exactly how I took the photo…. not quite a silhouette but dark enough to catch the rays of sun reflecting off the wet rye in the field.

Which got me to thinking… which you who know me will immediately start quaking in fear; because y’all know what happens when I start thinking.  Anywho…  how do you find the courage to stand up for what you believe in?  Especially when it feels like the majority of the world does not understand you?  How do you keep yourself from following the status quo because maybe then your work, your vision will be noticed?  Sadly, not because it is special, but because it looks like everyone else’s?  How do you keep moving forward on days where it feels like the only person who believes in you (or your work) is you?  Yeah, yeah… that was more than one thought.

Well??? I’m waiting <tapping fingers on the table top>…

Okay.  Time’s up.  I guess I will just have to jump to the part where I answer my own question.  Not that I have the answers, but here is what I have learned:

1.  Developing a thick skin:  

Now bear with me.  I realize this is starting out to sound very cheesy – and a concept you have heard a bazillion times; but think about this for a moment.  In order to find the courage to share what you love – whether that is blogging, photography, being a fashionista, a DIY’er, a travel expert; you have got to have thick skin.  Because I guarantee you someone is going to think “why in God’s name do I want to read what she has to write” or “her photography is hideous” or “how can she think she’ll ever be a fashion Photo of a sunset over a field of wheat with a silhouette of a dog looking to his right.designer – she wore mismatched clothes her whole life” or “Ha!  She can’t even hit a nail on the head.  How does she think she can be a successful DIY’er?”  You get the idea.

Come on… admit it.  You’ve heard those comments (or something similar) at one point in your life.  And how did you overcome it?  By having a thick skin and saying, “Not today Satan, not today!”  (Okay – if you haven’t seen the video of Jimmy Fallon and actress Kerry Washington performing a Mad Lib theater – go Google it RIGHT NOW!  I’ll wait.  And make sure yowatch to the end – because in all honesty it’s not as funny in the beginning.) 

2. Finding the why:

Why are you struggling with comments someone else made?  Why does it matter to you?  Why do you want to do what you are trying to do?  Why are you seeking approval?  Why don’t you believe in your passion?  Why do you expect anyone else to believe in your passion if you don’t?  And this one deserves to be asked twice – Why do you want to do what you are trying to do?  If you can sit down and honestly answer those questions, and have more positive answers than negative ones; my bet is you’ll be able to hit the ‘send’ button because you will have found your courage.

3. Recognizing that passion triumphs over fear:  

After spending some time discovering your why, you’ll find out whether you have a passion for something or whether it was just kill the time.  If it’s a passion, you will realize that’s what is driving you to keep moving forward.  Passion is one of the toeholds you need for reaching the apex of courage.

4. Realizing that the courage you need, you’ve had all along: 

When I look back at the things I’ve faced over my lifetime, including being diagnosed with breast cancer and surviving chemotherapy, I made the realization that the courage I was looking for was within me the whole time.  I just needed to push aside the naysayers (including myself), find my why and my strengths.  When all those came together the bells started ringing, dinging, and chiming.  So incredibly loud in fact, I had to ask them politely to keep it down.  (Me, polite?  Right….)

Photo of bride and groom looking at each other with focus on brides ring and bouquet

Typing and/or reading this – it sounds easy doesn’t it?  Trust me when I say it’s not.  But anything that is worth something is never easy (think giving birth, surviving chemo – you know what I’m talking about).  The truth is, if it was easy not only would everyone be doing it, but it would not be as satisfying to accomplish it.  The only things I’ve ever truly valued are the ones I have had to work especially hard at – so I am going to keep working diligently, love the process, and allow my courage to shine through; instead of worrying about the “what-if’s”.  I hope you will too!

In fact, leave me a comment and tell me what do you want to accomplish?  Or, how will you help someone else accomplish their dream?  Can you like their page on social media?  Can you share their post?  Invite your friends to follow them?  Can you offer to watch their kids while they work on a project?  Can you talk to them and find out what their dream is?  If you do, leave me a comment and let me know – I’d love to hear all about those dreams!

Until next time, capture life kreatively!

Myra

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Photography by:  Kreatively Captured | Myra J. Horner